Sep 122014

“So then”, says the squirrel, “a whole group of adventurers come traipsing through. And one of them had a DOG!”

I stumbled across another unexpected something while running The Tracker’s Trap last night with a handful of guildmates. There we were, dealing with one very large group of bad guys after another, when I notice this chipper little dude staring up at me.

A squirrel. And not just any squirrel, this is a squirrel of unusual size. Nearly as big as Knicker! Not that Knicker is particularly big, au contraire, but even so she is still very large in squirrel terms.

Except not for this squirrel, to him Knicker is almost exacly squirrel-sized. Also unusual, most squirrels/birds/foxes/deer run away when you approach. Not this guy. He pulls up on his haunches for a conversation. Maybe he is hoping for a nut?

“Geoff, where are you?” I hear over voice chat. The fighting, off ahead in the distance, sounds quite intense. My Gamer Girl looks over to see what I’m doing. “He’s taking pictures. Again.”

And so I am. The squirrel is fascinating. He chitters and chirps, turning away only when I stop paying attention to him.

The gnolls or yuan-ti or whatever can wait, there are always more of those. But I’ve only seen the one squirrel like this one, ever.

Anyone can fight
Bad guys are an endless stream
But check out this squirrel!

Using “Squirrel” in haiku is fraught with peril. Where I grew up, “squirrel” is two syllables: “skwur’-rel”. But where I live now it is only one: “skwerl”. So pretend you are reading the above verse while in the Southeastern U.S.

Meanwhile, this squirrel and I, we have things to discuss.

You go on ahead. I’ll catch up.

πŸ™‚ πŸ˜€ πŸ™‚

  12 Responses to “Squirrel!”

Comments (12)
  1. Two pit fiends take a break over some lava lattes.
    Arraetrikos: A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, “I forgot to store acorns for the winter and now I am dead.”
    Horeth: “Ha! That’s funny!”
    A tiefling overhears the conversation and says, “I don’t get it.”
    Before ripping out the tieflings entrails and using him for a napkin, Arraetrikos answers, “It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.”

  2. Somewhere out there is Stephen King collection of short stories, at least I remember them as King but keep in mind I may be going back 30+ years . In that collection is a squirrel or two and I imagine that that one there just might be the second or third in the line. If it is then may I suggest; Do not turn out the lights and go afk the next time you slip out to talk peanuts. …..anyone else remember the story I’m thinking of? ..without revving up the S engine?

    • Do not recall. I remember “The Mangler” though, and have had newfound respect for those who work in laundries ever since.

  3. “What about the R.O.U.S-es?” “‘Rodents Of Unusual Size’? I don’t think they exist…”

  4. Apologies for the sound quality and the shameless plug Geoff but I wanted to make sure you heard it:…speak-its-name

    After I wrote this the refs at the larp I do wrote giant squirrels in to their monster manual – they thought it would be easier to physrep a giant one…

  5. That screenshot is absolutely priceless.

    I remember the first time I ran Tracker’s… came across that (not-so-) little guy and just stopped for like 10 minutes to watch him.

    Dare I hope for a squirrel cosmetic companion?

  6. going to run that one today to find it πŸ™‚

  7. That is interesting, That reminds me of when I used to spend vacations up in Higgins Lake, Michigan and would feed chipmunks and squirrels by hand with my father’s beer nuts. Very peaceful critters and wonder what the story is about this large, friendly critter!!

  8. So does this make Knicker Squirrel Girl?

What do you think?

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