Tomorrow is a day of change.
Tomorrow, I wake up, pack two cars, and head for the mountains. New apartment, new life, new everything.
There is another change that has been brewing and I think it makes the most sense to include all of the changes at once, ripping the great big change-bandaid off as quickly as possible, hoping to lessen any pain.
For the better part of the last eight years my routine has been wake up, make coffee, perform certain biological ablutions, and write a blog article. Usually, but not always, a blog article about DDO. Because DDO was part of my daily routine too.
Starting in 2006, I played DDO every day. When I wasn’t working, and wasn’t required to be doing something else, I was in the game. It was that simple. If I wasn’t playing it was because I couldn’t be.
There were weekends where I went straight from work Friday night to DDO, ordered food, and played till I passed out. Wake up Saturday, repeat. Wake up Sunday, repeat.
I filled my non-gaming life with DDO-related activities too. My head was in the game 24/7 whether I was technically logged in or not. I didn’t just mow the lawn, I mowed and listened to DDOCast. Even in the shower I was probably thinking of ways to make my character better.
All DDO, all the time. I didn’t really play the game at all. I lived it.
It was a pretty awesome life too, something I do not in any way regret. The game helped me when I was working out of town for several years. It helped me the most when my first wife passed away. Beyond just helping me through things, it added to my life.
I made great friends that I will have forever.
I met my Gamer Girl. And we both made DDO our life, together, for several more years.
But – hard as it is – it is time to face up to the fact that DDO is not my life any more. I don’t play every day. I’m not even sure I play every week. I don’t live and breathe it. I don’t plan characters in the shower.
This fade has affected my blogging. I used to write long-form articles like this, or creative ones like this, or spend hours refining silly graphics to get them just so like this, or do research and post it for the world’s benefit (or so I imagined, even though no page on my site has ever been seen by more than a few thousand readers).
Now I can barely find time to post a picture from my screenshot library and wrap 100 words around it.
I have a new game, Elder Scrolls Online, but only sort of; I don’t play it very seriously. I imagine that most weeks I actually spend more time in DDO. I like ESO but it just doesn’t grip me the way that DDO once did.
No game does.
I have moved into a part of my life that does not need an MMO.
That whole concept is oddly-shaped and slippery in my brain, hard to consider: I both accept it and reject it at the same time. Done with MMOs? Or at least, done with living in them rather than occasionally playing them?
I think so.
And part of that means I am also done with writing a blog article every weekday.
I’m not closing anything down, gamergeoff.com and DDOGamer.com will both still be here, and it is still true that anyone who wants to write here can. Just let me know and I’ll have you set up, you’ll probably be able to publish something that very same day.
But I will not be. Not every day. When I have something to say, sure, but not just because I have a self-imposed daily deadline.
I wonder how often I will actually write now that I am lifting that deadline? I’d like to think it will still be pretty frequently, but I don’t know, this is new territory for me. Once a week? Once a month? More? Less?
I have no idea.
It seems that most of the blogs in the world are mainly filled with posts about how they never write blog posts, or are late, or have been too busy, or whatever. People writing about not writing, or more likely, not writing at all. I do not want to be that guy. If you ever see a post from me apologizing for how long it has been since my last post, please just do us all a favor and shoot me.
Sometimes I expect I might even still write about DDO. If I get to the point where I am no longer posting at least one DDO article per month I will have to stop being a DDO fansite. It could come to that, too, but not right away. I am still playing the game, even if awkwardly and intermittently, and I have so much invested in it. So much love, so much life, so much … everything. So much.
I should thank both of you who have put up with this inanity and drivel for all these years! How amazing, and how satisfying it has been to count your visits (over a million of you, all together) and read your comments and know that you’ve found value here, somehow, amidst all the dross.
Or maybe you just found quantity and mistook it for quality? Probably that, writing every weekday for eight years adds up to a whole bunch of articles. About 2000 blogs.
Just for fun, I exported them all and loaded the result into Microsoft Word: 6546 pages. 1.4 million words. That is an impressive pile of tripe, huh?
You all are why I did that. You all are why I kept this going as long as I did.
That and my love for the game.
But mainly you all. You’re incredible. Remember this thing you did?
All good things must end
But this one isn’t ending
It’s just slowing down
But I digress, again. I am entering a new part of my life and change has become the new normal. This particular change has been coming for a while now.
I love you all, and I’ll see you soon! Just not as soon as has been the case since 2009.
🙂 😀 🙂