Luedwig has always hated Prophecy; prophecy on the other hand, isn’t so bad. When dealing in prophecy, note the small “p”, one can simply go about their everyday, nod their head politely and use the earliest opportunity to slip away. There are other ways to deal with Prophecy, note the Capital “P”. Running around the Market Place, banging your head against every wall that refuses to acknowledge the logic of your arguments should not be included amongst their numbers; not if one seeks to avoid an extended stay in the Stormreach Asylum.
Prophecy is Sentient. It is a passive aggressive, ferociously facetious, piece of shit! The dwarf appears to be the only one aware of this little gem. Prophecy is also a vindictive bully and when all the dragons begin whining and crying about how mean and cruel and above all; how Trollish, Luedwig was behaving well… His punishment is another long wet kiss of Madness in his favourite Asylum. Prophecy then goes one step further; it reforms his mad ravings into a nasty, resonating syrup of sound. It thrusts the earworm deep along the canal and then slips out through the crack beneath the door.
I have provided an un-looped splice of the horror that runs 24-7 inside the mind of our poor dwarf. Well, it runs 24-7 until the hero of our story; Durk of the Kobold Princes, takes up the quest and smuggles an Heroic True Heart of Wood into the padded room, Dream-Side 5a. So ends Luedwig’s 3rd Ranger Life.
If you are feeling truly brave today and are up to the challenge; please, listen to the song a few times and try to sing along; give that worm an honest chance to nestle in. 😉
Prophecy takes license to summarize and paraphrase the dwarf’s nasty behaviour in the Market Place(original rants and ravings not provided, for they are very naughty indeed)while retaining his unique point of view:
Thanks for visiting,
Luedwig Bait H’oven
PS. An extra special Thank You goes out to Bear and Miss T for recording this “Eberronian” take on Hal David’s and Burt Bacharach’s Song; (They Long to Be) Close to You. I also want to extend that extra-double Thank You to the sister and brother that who made the original song such a hit; Karen and Richard Carpenter. Karen died in 1983 from heart failure due to her struggles with anorexia. And some of us think we have it tough! Have you ever watched Karen drum? You-Tube it and puzzle over how a woman that alive ends up dying the way she does.